What’s wrong with this picture?

so wanda gets some prescription medication from her lady doctor this week.

she hands me the instruction sheet that comes inside the box and asks me to read it and tell her what i think.   here’s a portion of what i read:

WARNINGS.  THE FOLLOWING WARNINGS, PRECAUTIONS AND ADVERSE REACTIONS ASSOCIATED WITH ***********SHOULD BE TAKEN INTO ACCOUNT:

1. Cardiovascular disorders

2. Coronary heart disease and strokes

3. Venous thromboembolism

4. Malignant neoplasms

5. Endometrial cancer

6. Breast cancer

7. Dementia

8. Gall bladder disease (wanda’s safe on this one…)

9. Hypercalcemia

10. Visual abnormalities

11. Elevated blood pressure

12. Hypertriglyceridemia

13. Hypothyroidism

14. Fluid retention

15. Exacerbation of endometriosis

16. Nausea

17. Vomiting

18. Abdominal cramps

19. Bloating

20. Cholestatic jaundice

21. Pancreatitis

22. Enlargement of hepatic hemangiomas

23. Loss of scalp hair

24. Pruritus rash

25. Hemorrhagic eruptions

26. Chloasma

27. Erythema multiforme

28. Retinal vascular thrombosis

29. Migraine headaches

30. Dizziness

31. Mental depression

32. Chorea

33. Nervousness

34. Mood disturbances

35. Irritability

36. Exacerbation of epilepsy

37. Increase or decrease of weight

38. Reduced carbohydrate tolerance

39. Aggravation of  porphyria

40. Edema

41. Leg cramps

42. Changes in libido

43. Hypersensitivity

44. Anaphylactoid/anaphylactic reactions

45. Increased triglycerides

wanda:  “so what do you think?”

mike:  “does it come, like, in a tube?”

wanda:  “uh-huh.”

mike:  “we have some ceramic tile that needs re-grouting in the spare bathroom.   i think we should use it there, instead.”

#doctors #wanda