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this is not the first time you’ve heard of something like this. sadly, it won’t be the last. a kansas city newspaper is reporting about what’s going on at a church in the area:
KANSAS CITY, Missouri – A Johnson County pastor wants local couples to show more love this Valentine’s season. Pastor Timmy Gibson of Mercy Church, in Prairie Village, issued his annual “Hanky Panky Challenge” for the month of February. Gibson is challenging all married couples to have sex every day in honor of Valentine’s Day. The pastor believes this will help create more intimacy in the relationship. This is the sixth year the pastor has created this challenge to the public.
really? this. again?
at the risk of a major TMI…and a loud, resounding “ewwww” from my son, corey…i’m going to state what should be obvious to everyone who knows us: wanda and i still have sex. i state this simply for credibility. we are no prudes. everything still works the way god intended. sex is still, as it always has been, a really fun part of our relationship. wanda is still blushing…
so don’t misunderstand what i’m going to say.
i’m really tired of pastors and churches doing these 28-day sex challenges (or seven days or whatever…). here’s why:
first, it smells like marketing. it smells like a cheap way to get some press for their churches. everybody knows that sex sells. look, i’m not against marketing. i’m still trying to get nike to sponsor north point. (they sponsor everybody else…and i think a nike swoosh would look totally sweet in the NP lobby…). no, what bugs me is that pastors are setting up couples…especially wives…for failure, at the expense of hip promo.
second, why do we never hear women leaders calling for the same challenge? this just seems like another way for men to exert their power and influence over women. and since we all know that the pastor “dudes” are the anointed spokesmen for god, who are we to challenge this sanctified message from the almighty for more sex?
third, for all of the studies and insight we have into the depth and complexities of male-female relationships, you would think pastors, of all people, would show some sensitivity to the fact that we are all different…and we all function different in our relationships. it appears, on the most basic levels, that women might have slightly different needs than men…and most men might have some different needs than women. and each might have a different path to sexual and emotional fulfillment than the other. not to mention, that women are different from other women…and not all men have just one thing on their minds (with all due respect to the crap that dr. laura spewed a few years back).
finally, here’s what i think about the intimacy thing. are these people idiots, or what? you don’t have sex to create intimacy. sex is a by-product of healthy intimacy. intimacy is about talking and listening. it’s about soul connection. it’s about serving and laughing and dreaming and forgiving and understanding. intimacy happens in the intellect…in our emotions…in our spirits…long before it can ever happen physically. if its real intimacy.
maybe our marriages would be a whole lot better off if we would make…and keep…a challenge to have deep and meaningful conversation…not sex…every day for 28 days.
i think i’m going to call fox news…
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