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Marriage Tuesday

Writer's picture: Mark RoseMark Rose

not sure if you’re into new year’s resolutions.   seems like the whole process has kind of faded over the course of my lifetime.   maybe too many failures.   maybe the process is just outdated.

even if you think end-of-the-year reflecting and projecting is a little too archaic for your hip,  modern lifestyle,  let me put in word for some old-fashioned goal setting.

look…in the immortal words  of the great philosopher,  george harrison  (too bad if you’re under 45),   “if you don’t know where you are going,  any road will take you there.”    apologies to all english lit majors…the beatles trump alice in wonderland.

back to marriage.   the majority of marriages i know are simply headed down any road. husbands are absorbed with work and careers and some side-projects around the house or at the gym.   wives are consumed with jobs or homes.   both  (or neither)  are fully invested in the schedule-busting routines of thier children.   but where is the investment in the marriage?

a marriage without some tangible goals is headed to irrelevance.   a marriage without a focus on the marriage will,  sooner or later,  arrive at exactly the destination to which its pointed…nowhere.

i’m not going to beat this one up today.   its nothing new.   i’ve said it in a dozen different ways over the past couple of years.   i’ll leave you with this:

you and your spouse have some time this week.   you know you do.   i guarantee you have some this coming new year’s day.   your favorite team is not playing every game during the day’s football-fest.   carve out some time and sit down for an hour and talk about your life together.   where you’ve been.   where you’re going.   where you want to be…and how you’re planning to get there.

this is about you and your partner.   not you and your kids or in-laws or co-workers or your church family.   it’s simply about this union you forged some time ago.

2010 is almost over.   what makes you think your marriage in 2011 will be any better than it was last year?

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