Less than ideal…

i said yesterday there were some ideals that didn’t need improving.

i still believe that.

i always will.  there are some truths that i hold on to…that i stake my life on…that i am unashamed to proclaim…and that i believe everyone,  and i mean everyone,  should submit to.

but we don’t live in a perfect world.   and some people…maybe even most people…live with less than the ideal.

for years,  i have seen innocent kids be abused, neglected or even blamed in the bitterness of their parent’s divorce…only to rise above it all and become healthy,  loving,  forgiving servant-leaders.   amazing.

i have a friend who grew up in a family with two lesbian parents…and in spite of all the fears and predictions,  he grew up to be a loving husband and father,  with a passionate heart for god and others.

i have performed the wedding ceremonies of many couples who have lived together…and who’s understanding of the joy and genius of a marriage covenant came along well after they had consummated the act.   and they’re okay.

i have walked through the painful divorces and remarriages of friends who, despite deep feelings of failure and even deeper convictions of falling short of god’s ideal,  are currently experiencing the reality of god’s grace and forgiveness as they move forward with their new lives.   go figure.

i have witnessed the marriages of people whom i believed had no business getting married…who were unequally yoked  in varieties of ways…who had little support of friends or family…who were too young…who had no money…who were already pregnant…who had little,  or even no faith in god…whose motives were questionable…who knew nothing of sacrificial love…who got married under far less than ideal circumstances…yet they remain lovingly and faithfully married to each other.

i guess i’m just saying that before you climb up on your moral and theological high horse,  don’t forget that all of us are reclamation projects… doing the best we can with what we know…in an imperfect and fallen world.

i will hold to the ideal…

…while i hold the hands of those who fall short.

and i hope others would do the same for me.

#divorce #ideal #marriage