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i don’t mean to throw the middle school group under the bus tonight, but they were a perfect, unfiltered example of humanity.
we were talking about anger (as kind of a follow-up to my sermon this past sunday) and i asked them to consider what they would do if i could show them…or convince them…that anger was a sin. i proceeded to paint a pretty blunt picture of how anger is an expression of the sinful nature that we all struggle with…and the very clear directives to not let the sun go down on our anger and to take responsibility to live at peace with every one.
then i asked if any of them had a problem with their temper or if they ever struggle with getting angry. what followed was a pretty colorful discussion of the various ways each of them get their “mad” on. and it would have been pretty funny, if it weren’t so true.
i’m not worried about them. they’re just kids. but they have already learned some life lessons they will have to outgrow, if they ever want their lives to make a kingdom difference someday.
anger comes so easy these days. everybody does it. it’s glamorized. we see it on the news every night. the anger of media stars is publicized daily on TMZ or on the cover of people magazine. sports heroes flex their self-centeredness for the world to see and make no apologies for their public antagonism directed against their opposition.
ugly divorces are commonplace. youtube has blown up with videos of gang violence, hate mongering and political ranting. the angry monologues on talk radio are entertainment for the masses. video games have taken violent expression beyond the already obscene limits of rational decency. we don’t even have to go down the road of musical lyrics or movie screenplays…where the artistic renderings of anger know no boundaries.
who’s to blame a kid?
i’m not saying this is easy, but let’s get one thing straight when it comes to anger. it’s a choice.
anger or getting mad (especially at someone) is never your only option. it may be the one you choose, but it’s never forced on you. it may be the easiest response because you are emotionally undisciplined. but nobody has ever been told they have to get mad. there are always alternatives.
and leave the whole “righteous” anger thing alone. if you think your anger is the same kind of anger god would have in the situation, you’re fooling yourself. elevating your self-righteousness to the level of deity is pretty risky business.
anger…getting hurt…blowing up…acting out…giving the silent treatment… gossiping… creating factions…hatred… dissensions… division…shutting down communication…frustration…stress…aggravation…disappointment…sadness… irritation…are never the best choices. ever. never. ever.
compassion…
forgiveness…
mercy…
grace…
patience…
understanding…
peacefulness…
kindness…
determination…
introspection…
sympathy…
unity…
benefit of the doubt…
tolerance…
consideration…
help…
support…
comfort…
are all viable alternatives. and much better choices.
so when are we going to stop giving each other permission to act out in anger…in all its various forms and expressions… and start loving god more than we love our feelings?
you are angry by choice. period.
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