A view from the cheap seats

“i can do it myself!”

i’m really beginning to develop a pretty intense love-hate affair with my own sermon series.

wading into this  “If You Really Knew Me” territory has been enlightening…frustrating…overwhelming…and even terrifying.   today’s study was more of the same,  as we looked at the story of barak and deborah in judges, chapter four.

if you weren’t there,  here’s the quick version of the story:  the jews are being oppressed by the canaanites, who are under the military leadership of a dude name sisera.  deborah is the prophet-judge of the jews that god appointed to lead them in the absence of a king.  the jews were living in open disobedience and recklessness to god.

deborah found barak and told him that god had set him apart to lead the attack on sisera and his army and take the jews back from their oppression.  she told him of the exact plan that god had set in motion and insured his victory.

barak spoke these words back to deborah:  “if you go with me, i will go.”

unlike the commentators and preachers i read during my study this week,  i don’t see barak as wimpy and  spineless… unable to act like a real man and wasn’t strong enough to be a leader.   rather,  i see in barak a man who was able to do what most of us don’t even realize we should be doing!

barak recognized (for whatever reasons) that he couldn’t do the task alone…and wasn’t afraid to show his weakness and admit he needed help.

like so many other things in life,  it seems like we get this wrong most of the time.   somewhere along the line, we are taught to bow to the value of being able to do things all by ourselves. maybe it starts when mommy and daddy praise us for using the potty all by ourselves for the first time.   or when we ride our bikes all by ourselves for the first time.   or when we solve some kind of problem all by ourselves for the first time.

whatever.  at some point during our adolescent journey we begin to believe that doing things all by ourselves is the symbol of maturity.   to be known as somebody who looks great…and performs great…and has all the answers…and has our act together…and never has problems…and has no needs…and always projects a life that is independently strong and autonomous…is what we are to strive for.

and what we are to project even if it isn’t true!

somewhere,  we learn to hide our weaknesses…lie to cover our mistakes…smile to mask our pain…dress to cover our limitations…value hypocrisy over honesty…fake instead of owning up…and do just about anything to keep from having to ask others for help.

this is sick.   and unbiblical.

god’s design is for us to live openly…admit our sin…confess our shortcomings…embrace our weaknesses…pray for each other…bear each other’s burdens…stand by each other…kill judgmental attitudes…snuff out any air of superiority…give freely of what we have for the good of others…receive freely the grace of god and the compassionate and humble expressions of generosity and partnership of our friends.

to do this requires humility,  honesty,  and a willingness to say,  “if you go with me,  i will go.”